Choose Yours. Cheer Hers

Damned If We Do, and Damned If We Don't.

She's had work done. She hasn't.

She's going grey. She's dying it every six weeks.

She's has so much work done. She's let herself go.

None of these are wrong.

Part 3 is about the judgement we give, the judgement we get, and what it actually looks like to let all of it go - for other women and for ourselves. Your choices are valid. So are hers. 🤍

Part 3 - Choose Yours. Cheer Hers.

Welcome to Part Three

The woman who gets botox. The woman who doesn't.

The woman who's had a facelift. The woman who's letting it all go gray and natural.

Do you judge? Even a little? Even the thought you'd never say out loud?

Parts 1 and 2 of our Aging Authentically campaign were about your relationship with your own aging. This part? It's about your relationship with OTHER women's choices.

No shame. Most of us do. But this is where we start to let that go. 🤍

Choose Yours. Cheer Hers.

Two women. Two completely different choices about aging.

One is not braver than the other. One is not more vain than the other. One is not more enlightened than the other.

They just… made different choices. About their own faces. Which is, you know, their right.

Choosing what to do with your own aging is not a moral decision. It's a personal one.

And personal decisions don't require your approval. Or mine. 🤍

~ Frankie

The Judgement We Don't Talk About

Here's the judgment we don't talk about:

The woman who's had "too much" done. We look at her and think… things. The woman who's "let herself go." We look at her and think… things.

The woman who's aging "naturally" gets called brave. The woman who's had work done gets called insecure.

We are judging everyone. And we're pretending we're not. I'm not calling you out. I'm calling us both out. Because I've done it too. And I'm over it. 🤍 Who's with me?

　

~ Frankie

Done With It

Here's the judgment we don't talk about:The woman who's had "too much" done. We look at her and think… things.

The woman who's "let herself go." We look at her and think… things.

The woman who's aging "naturally" gets called brave.

The woman who's had work done gets called insecure.

We are judging everyone. And we're pretending we're not.

I'm not calling you out. I'm calling us both out. Because I've done it too. And I'm over it. 🤍

~ Frankie

Lift Her Up

Comments officially retired. Effective immediately:

❌ "She's had so much work done."

❌ "She needs to do something about that."

❌ "She looked so much better before."

❌ "Good for her for aging naturally!" *(yes, even this one — it implies the other option isn't ok)*

❌ "She'd be pretty if she just…"

Here's the thing - the world is already quick enough to make women feel small. We don't need to do it to each other. So instead of tearing her down, lift her up. "I love that for you."

Because we rise by lifting each other up. Every single time. 🤍

~ Frankie

Grey, glam, or Botox'd.

Age with botox. Age without it.

Age with gray hair. Age with dye.

Age with a full routine. Age with moisturizer and done.

Age with a facelift. Age with whatever you were born with.

Age loudly. Age quietly. Age on your own terms.

There is no right way to do this. Only YOUR way. And hers. All valid. All worthy of the same respect. 🤍

~ Frankie

It doesn't cost you anything.

Here’s the thing about cheering for other women - It doesn’t cost you anything.

She gets botox? Good for her. She’s happy.

She’s going full grey? Gorgeous. She’s happy.

She got a procedure that changed her life? Wonderful. She’s happy.

She’s doing absolutely nothing and doesn’t care? Love that. She’s happy.

Other women’s happiness doesn’t take anything from yours.There’s enough “looking great” to go around.

~ Frankie

A toast to all of us.

A toast.

To the woman who got botox and feels great.

To the woman who looked at all her options and chose nothing.

To the woman who's somewhere in between, figuring it out.

To the woman who's done all of the above at different points in her life.

To every woman who's had a complicated, funny, sad, infuriating, tender relationship with her own face.

To all of us. 🥂🤍

~ Frankie

Choose Yours Cheer Hers Manifesto

The Choose Yours. Cheer Hers. Manifesto:

I will make my choices. You will make yours.

My choices don't need your approval.

Your choices don't need mine.

I will not call you brave for aging naturally.

I will not call you insecure for choosing procedures.

I will not make your aging a moral issue.

I will mind my own beautiful, complicated, aging business - and cheer for yours.

This is what women supporting women actually looks like. 🤍

~ Frankie

You Answered. We Listened. 🤍

We judge. We catch ourselves. We try again.

You told us what really happens in that split second when we see another woman's face - the judgment, the curiosity, the admiration, and the quick little catch-and-correct that follows. The answers weren't perfectly polished. They were human.

Results from the Choose Yours. Cheer Hers. community survey · Summer 2026

When you see a woman who's clearly had "a lot of work done," what's your honest first reaction?

Good for her - she looks great 9.1%

A little judgment… and then I catch myself 57.6%

Curiosity - I wonder what she had done 24.2%

I don't really notice or think about it 9.1%

And when you see a woman your age who's done nothing at all - grey hair, wrinkles, all of it?

I find her inspiring 39.4%

I admire it, but I couldn't do it myself 15.2%

I wonder if she wishes she'd done more 6.1%

I don't think anything of it - it's her face 39.4%

Be honest: have you ever quietly judged another woman's aging choices?

Yes, very often 9.1%

Sometimes 60.6%

Rarely 18.2%

No, I really don't 12.1%

Have you ever felt judged for an aging choice you made - or didn't make?

Yes - for doing something (botox, filler, etc.) 3%

Yes - for doing nothing (grey hair, wrinkles) 21.2%

Both, at different times 0%

No, not that I've noticed 75.8%

How close are you to a true "live and let live" attitude - about your choices and hers?

I'm there - no judgment, either direction 27.3%

Working on it - slow going 15.2%

Working on it - making progress 39.4%

No need - I'm good as I am 18.2%

In Their Own Words 🤍

We asked: "What's one judgment about aging you're trying to let go of - about yourself or about someone else?" The answers were honest, complicated, and occasionally blunt. Here are a few, exactly as they were shared.

I hate sagging skin on myself & other. I will never go thru any procedure but I have a hard time accepting.

I rarely tell people my age for fear of them changing their attitude about me because I am older. Yet I celebrate women my age who own it and take care of themselves.

No judgment as such, but I do like that people try to make the most of what they have, not necessarily their face, but their whole person.

People who alter their bodies with so much surgery that they look plastic.

The social pressure to be beautiful and. Forever young and why do men get a pass but women do not.

Our favourite answer 🤍

Who has judgements about aging??? We're lucky to age, it means we're not dead yet!

Here's the uncomfortable truth: 87.9% of us admitted we've judged another woman's aging choices at least once - even if it was only quietly, inside our own heads. But 66.7% also said we're working toward a true "live and let live" attitude. That matters.

Your face is yours. Her face is hers. Choose yours. Cheer hers. And when the judgment sneaks in? Catch it, question it, and let it go.

This is part of the Aging Authentically campaign - more honest conversations, more room for every choice, and a whole lot less deciding how another woman should age. 🤍